Tuesday 26 March 2013

Radio National and other interesting things


I love Radio National! I only listen to it in the car where I’m a captive audience.  If I listened anywhere else, I’d never get anything done! Anyway, earlier this month, I heard some fascinating information on RN regarding the practice of Bacha Posh in Afghanistan. This refers to a cultural practice where if a family have no boys, they select one of their girls to be a boy.  They dress as boys and are raised as boys with all the attendant privileges. However, around 18 (or marriageable age), they revert to girls.  The program was focusing on a Sydney academic who was studying the fluidity of gender and focusing on this practice. See
Researching further, I found there is also a practice called Bacha Bazi in Afghanistan- which refers to boys who dress as girls.  This is a far more sinister practice where as a symbol of wealth and power, men buy boys and train them to be dancers to entertain and have sex with men.  Apparently outlawed by the Taliban, this practice is now re-emerging and growing. See documentary by journalist Najibullah Quraishi The Dancing Boys of Afghanistan.
I would be very interested to read Milla Khodai’s thesis.  I can’t help but assume that the strict rules surrounding gender roles, inequality and segregation give birth to such perversion. Catholic priests are another case in point.

Moving on to something joyous to dry those tears:

My partner, in the car, heard something about training Ghanaian leaders, and asked me to find the RN program he heard. I found the program and in the process found TED! I don’t know how many of you have heard of TED but I want to shout it to the world – TED! It’s the most exciting discovery I’ve had in a long time. TED is a nonprofit organisation devoted to Ideas Worth Spreading.  TED Talks are “riveting talks by remarkable people, free to the world” http://www.ted.com/.  But wait there’s more – there’s Ted Ed for children!

 

Something wonderful I found was information on fourth grade school teacher, John Hunter, who created the World Peace Game. His fourth grade students are divided into different countries and they have to work together to solve various problem scenarios. My eldest grandson is in Year 4.  I would love to see him and his peers take on such a challenge.

And by the way, that RN program was about  Patrick Awuah on educating leaders.


Monday 25 March 2013

The Road to Recovery



Who you live with, work with, spend time with rubs off on you. There is a culture in each community.  That’s why parents don’t like their children hanging around with the wrong crowd.  One young woman I know hated her husband’s work.  Initially she encouraged him to develop friendships there but  by doing so he joined the culture of drinking and gambling and being selfish which isn’t good for anyone but may be acceptable for singles.  This man had a wife and 5 children dependent on him!

What I’m getting at is:
I suffer from depression.  So does my husband and so does my son. I am medicated and seek assistance from professionals.  They don’t.  It is hard to get motivated for positive behaviour at home.  The men always seem so vocal about what hasn’t been done around the house, but they never do it.  Therefore, I can only assume that they expect me to do it all.  I am constantly weighted down with the anger and resentment I feel because of expectations – real or imagined. I can’t even live up to my own expectations.  I know I should be on top of things.  I don’t want to live in chaos.  But dragging me down and stagnating me is the thought:  why should I have to do it all?

I could sit down with them and say:  let’s all try to be positive and pitch in and get things done around here.  Ha! It makes me extremely anxious just thinking about it.  It makes me think that this family group has passed its use-by date. I have no trust in them to react positively to such a suggestion. Like I cannot trust anyone to put the bin out by collection time, even if they have been asked and said they would and a long line of other things I could not trust them with.

I need a support group – group therapy I guess - probably gender-based but maybe it doesn’t matter- where we come together to encourage each other in positive behaviours.  It will become our own cultural community.  Yes, I think it should be just women - include some willing positive people  for peer-group mentoring.   I think it is like alcohol or drug rehab – how often the best mentors/counsellors are recovered alcoholics and addicts  because they are the ones who understand the hard road to recovery.  They are more likely to know all the pitfalls  and guide you through and not be so judgemental when you fail.  Maybe not true – my father is an ex-smoker who has no sympathy or understanding of my not quitting.  Smoking is part of the culture in my immediate family.  My husband and two children all smoke.  That’s a topic for another day.